With my fourth baby due in a month, the boys and I have been doing a lot of preparation for the upcoming birth. My oldest son really wants to be there and especially wants to cut the cord.
I am still on the fence about him being in the room, especially during transition, but I am open to exploring the options and will probably end up deciding the day of.
Since I am having a homebirth with midwives it will be easy for him to come in and out when he sees fit. I know that my labours are typically short and boring, as I tend to go inward…but the transition is pretty intense and I don’t really want to be distracted or scare him because I get a little vocal. (read – swear like a trucker).
But, I also want to honour that he would like to be there, and I think normalizing birth for children is so important for when they are older. If they see birth as a normal, natural process, they will be less likely to be influenced by he media that tries to convince us that it is a medical condition that needs “fixing”.
One of my most favourite ways to prepare my kids for my birth is by reading them the story Hello Baby by Jenny Overend. Hello Baby is a wonderful story about a mom with 3 kids who is having a homebirth with a midwife. She goes about her day while her husband and children set up for the birth and upcoming arrival of their new sibling. It is through the eyes of a 4 or 5 year old boy and is so beautifully illustrated that it really shows how calm and wonderful a birth can be.
I really recommend it for anyone who wants to normalize a vaginal birth, even if you would prefer to birth in hospital. The story has many questions that the boy asks that are exactly what any child expecting a new sibling would ask, and so easy for kids to understand.
Here is a link to get it on Amazon